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Thursday, August 19, 2004

School Spirit

i received this from a friend of mine via e-mail. I had such a good laugh at this that i HAD to post this here so that i can read this anytime i wanted to. Whoever wrote this deserves an award or something for having the balls to say what everybody wanted to say about those people who are so stuck up on which school they came from.

I hope whoever reads this enjoys it as much as I did.

On School Pride

Any of you catch the previous La Salle -Ateneo game? The one where La Salle blew a 15-point half time lead? The one that robbed many a Green's wallet and savings accounts of their contents? The one that most of you rubbed in my face the moment you saw me? Yeah, that one.

Well, it got me thinking of several things. Chief among which was how I can get away with bleeding Cardona's throat for choking YET AGAIN! But it also got me remembering about my college days. It seemed like eons ago and yet some feelings seem so fresh today even after 6 years.

I was a diehard Archer fan back then. Win or lose I'd be at the games, cheering and shouting for all I was worth. School Pride. You loved your campus and hated the others.

We all outgrow it eventually. Or do we? Let's test it shall we? Listed below are several schools and what I think of them. Try to see what you feel after reading what this jack-off had to say about your university.
Enjoy.


ATENEO

This school's trademark is arrogance. Nothing more, nothing less. I have, to this day, not met an Atenean who does not think that their school is THE best there is. Even La Sallites and um, uh, UP people (what do you call yourselves anyway?) are not this shamelessly boastful. This does not mean to say however, that they are all pricks and witches. Some of the best buds I have are Ateneans. All two of them. But come on! Seriously, the only thing Ateneo can claim to be the best in is creating a 2-hour gridlock over a road stretching 3 damned kilometers!!!

Oh, and Interdisciplinary Studies is NOT a course. It's Jesuit charity for the incurably dumb and lazy.

ADAMSON

Hmmm, let's see what I can say about Adamson. Well, there's the fact their school color is blue like Ateneo. Their team mascot is a bird like Ateneo. Aside from that, there's not a shred else. Damn this school is boring.

FEU and UE

Do any of you know what FEU stands for? Forever Useless! Yes, I'm an ass. But joking aside, the Far Eastern University and the University of the East are two schools whose names imply that at least one of them was founded by a group of people who had the creative, artistic, and imaginative prowess of a pile of rocks.

Seriously though, these are feel good schools. If you don't believe me try visiting either campus. The moment you see them, you start feeling good that you don't go there.

UP

Here's a school that, for better or worse, is totally bereft of any identity. Some people regard it as THE premier educational institution in the country. There are those who, for good reason, look at it simply as one big vicious playground. And others see it as a breeding ground for militant wannabe rebels who try to lobby for whatever cause they deem to be in the country's best interest. For those of you who can truly relate with the latter you have to be in your late 40's or 50's. Shit you're OLD!!! La lang.

I favor the first two views. It really IS the best educational institution there is. And I'm not just saying that because I'm surrounded all day by UP graduates who'd just as soon throw me off the 11th floor balcony given the slightest provocation as look at me. I really, really do believe...that they will kill me if I say anything bad against UP. Can you blame me? The only thing longer than the list of UP's distinguished alumni (Miriam Defensor included) is the list of all the in-campus violence. There's a psycho lurking deep inside each UP educated man/woman/child. This will be confirmed by the amount of hate mail I'll be receiving from them.

UST

Here's a school that will totally drag down one's social status just by being enrolled in it. I don't care how rich you are or how cultured you may be, if you're from UST it don't mean shit. That's not necessarily a bad thing. I know of several obnoxious AB kids who were brought down several pegs while studying there and are now some of the nicest, most unassuming people to walk this planet.

It's funny to note how much this place of learning mirrors the current social state of the country every time the UAAP season kicks in. Come the basketball tournament, they're all friends. You see them chanting, clapping, and giving each other high-fives. United by a common goal, the rich and the poor are united as one. After the event is passed, they all go back to hating each other.

DLSU

Di Lumusot Sa UPCAT. That's a classic ain't it? It's as hilarious now as it was when I first heard it in 1994, which is to say, it's about as funny as getting kicked in the crotch. It's sad to note for a proud alumnus such as myself that a school with as impressive an academic pedigree as La Salle has become nothing more than a money-hungry institution whose only requirements for acceptance nowadays seem to be a pulse, an IQ over 80, and the financial capacity/ability to pay.

Nowadays, whenever I incounter a person clayming to be from La Sall and they speech bad, have poor grammage, and cannot spill correctness, I am not surprice.

NU

I'm not even sure if this place is a real school. And I don't mean that in a snooty-you're-nothing-compared-to-my-school way. I mean I'm not even sure this place actually exists. I actually started believing that its initials really stood for Negative sa UPCAT.

Think about it. Do any of you really know anyone from NU? Do any of you even know of anyone who knows anybody from NU?

And if any of you even point to their basketball team and the audience that watches its games as proof of its existence, I beg you to think of this point. They act like absolute maniacs and they even look the part.
If we go by that, then the National University is not a school. It's a correctional facility.

CSB

This school has had a bad rep since the day of its inception. Admittedly, it started out as a place where DLSU can deposit its non-performing students so as not to give up the sizeable revenues from those hopeless bastards who have the money to shell out but not the ability to count it.

Everybody knows this already.

What people don't know is that CSB now boasts of fine world class courses designed to equip the Benildean with the tools necessary to succeed in the real world. These courses include Basic Arithmetic majoring in the Multiplication Table, Whining with a specialization on Tantrums, and the ever popular Strategic Investments: What to do with your Parents' Money.

CRC/UAP

Them Opus Dei folks can slap it with whatever initials they deem fit, it would still not change the fact that this school will forever be known not by its academic achievements but more by the fact that it is the only school with a car to student ratio nearing 1:1. (No my dear CSB students and alums, that is not read as one colon one.)

The meanest thing one can say about CRC is that it's a school filled with students rich enough to be Ateneans, but will never be smart enough to be such. The nicest thing one can say about CRC is that it's near a Starbucks open until 2 am.

Now I realize I might have offended some people out there. Let me tell you right now that I am whole-heartedly and humbly sorry. I am sorry that you have no sense of humor and nobody had the heart to whack your uptight head when you were growing up.

For those of you did appreciate this, I give seminars on insensitivity and creatively callous writing. Feel free to email me.

Peace and chill folks.

-psycho!!!

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