X-Men 3: Last Stand

I’ve finally seen the new X-men Movie.. whoopdedoo. Was it any good? Was it everything I expected?

No.

Don’t get me wrong, it was a good movie, sure, but it really didn’t feel like a real X-men story. Sort of like how you feel when you read an issue of “What If...” It’s interesting, but you can’t wait to read the next issue of the normal story arc.

“But neither are the two previous X Movies” you say?

Yeah, but at least the first movie had twists to character origins as a plus. It made the movie interesting… like an issue of “what if” it gave some semblance of a background so as not to confuse you with the normal story. It sort of gave the impression that it at least “told” you what sort of trip you were going to take. The changes to the characters were made to satisfy the “non-imaginative” people.

These are the non-comic readers by the way.

The second movie had a lot of cameos. Collosus, Warpath, Jubilee, Shadowcat, a guy who could’ve been Quicksilver, Cannonball… These cameos made the movie interesting.

I’m not saying I liked the first two to death, I’m saying I liked them better than the third.

I didn’t like them, but I didn’t hate them either. They were ok.

Which is why I sort of hated the third movie. I was kind of hoping they’d learn from the mistakes of the first two and get it right this time. I was hoping for a little more character development and not just one liners from each character. Or if they WERE one liners at least have them “talk” like they normally do. Take Beast for example, Beast should have wit, in the movie, he never has a good, witty, “I’m smarter than you, so you probably wouldn’t be able to get this” comeback to any of the shit Wolverine throws his way!

I was also looking for more attention to details, if not with the story, at least with the characteristics of each character. Let’s look at Juggernaut for example. Juggernaut’s unlimited power is only hindered by his vulnerability to psionic attacks, which is why he keeps wearing his massive helmet. He doesn’t wear that to protect his head! The Gem of Cyttorak does that for him. But in the movie you see him ALWAYS walking around sans helmet. Magneto’s not much smarter though as he keeps walking around without his helmet as well. I can understand why they didn’t use CG to make Juggy bigger and all but why, OH WHY did they have to show how hairy he was? AND CALLISTO DOES NOT HAVE SUPER SPEED AND CEREBRO LIKE POWERS!

I now go to my main complaint about the movie…

Cyclops.

Cyclops is the first X-man. He was Xaviers poster boy, he was what Xavier had in mind when he built the school. Scott’s only flaw in my opinion was his relationship with Jean Grey. It was cool that he’s shagging the next fave student of Xavier, but it’s waaaay too annoying to see him pine over her like a goddamn schoolboy.

Anyway, in the movie, just when we were finally treated to the tormented, angsty, dark Cyclops, he’s killed off worse than a nameless crew from Star Trek! Yeah, sure, he’s killed by the woman he loves more than life itself, but COME ON! At least dedicate some time to actually make us CARE that he’s being killed off! At least let us feel the loss of Xavier’s number one boy! If the Transformers was able to pull it off why can’t they?

But let me now go to the stuff I liked about the movie, the fight scenes and Wolverine’s rampage through the forest. That was cool! Violence at last. Beast going crazy and opening up a can o’ whoop ass on Magneto’s goons was great as well. Iceman’s fight with pyro was a bit lame but seeing “Bobby” turn into “Iceman” sent shivers down my fat, geeky spine. Seeing Juggernaut smash through walls was a treat and seeing Shadowcat in action was worth the ticket price.

But the best thing about this movie? PIPSQUEAK SPECIAL! Yeah! The special move Wolvie and Colossus use on big ass enemies.

Oh, and there was a sentinel in the movie… or at least a silhouette and its head.

I'm Looking forward to the next installment though, as they clearly set the tone for the next X-Movie. Although there are two obvious possible stories based on the ending scenes (Onslaught &/or Age of Apocalypse) , i hope they just pick one and get it right this time.